Buddha, head of security, in his police cap, aviators and badge
CLEAREDBY SECURITY

You're in.

Buddha let you through. He is still watching.

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Put it on the TVControl Center → Screen Mirroring → Family Room or Guest Room.
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Good for 30 daysCome back within a month and your phone gets straight on. No sign-in.
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Security's house rules
  1. Food that hits the floor belongs to security.
  2. No sudden moves near the couch.
  3. Treats are accepted. They are not a bribe. (They are a bribe.)
Start browsing
The fine print you agreed to
  1. Be a good guest. Use this Wi-Fi for normal things: browsing, streaming, music, video calls, work.
  2. Nothing illegal. No piracy, hacking, harassment, or anything you wouldn't want to explain to a judge. Or to Buddha.
  3. Leave the rest of the house alone. Don't try to get into other devices or networks here. Security has been told you read this.
  4. Share fairly. Huge downloads (game updates, whole seasons) slow things down for everyone. Please be reasonable.
  5. No guarantees. This Wi-Fi is free and provided as is. It may slow down, drop out or change at any time. We aren't responsible for your device, your data or anything you do online. Keep your own security up to date.
  6. What gets logged. The network records which devices connect, when, and which sites and services they reach, to keep things running and secure. It can't read the contents of encrypted traffic, and nothing is sold or shared.
  7. Access can be removed at any time, for any reason, including Buddha's mood.

Treats are accepted. They do not count as a bribe. (They do.)